The Holiday Text Message Epidemic is Out of Control

There’s an epidemic going around this holiday season and it’s not the swine flu. It’s much worse than that…It’s the holiday text message. The holiday text message is a mass text message that is sent out from a friend or family member wishing you a happy holiday. This may seem like a friendly act, but it is not.

As texting has becoming more mainstream, I’ve seen an exponential increase in the number of text messages I receive on a given holiday each year. Mothers, grandmothers, toddlers: they’re all texting these days. The problem is getting increasingly worse.

The worst days for holiday text messaging are upon us. Thanksgiving, which just passed, is one of them. Christmas, New Years Day and Easter are the other three main culprits. Jewish people, you are safe for 50 percent of these holidays. This might be the only scenario where a Christian would be jealous of a Jewish holiday.

This past Thanksgiving, I must have received at least 20 text messages from friends and family wishing me a happy Thanksgiving. Here I am, trying to have nice Thanksgiving dinner with my family and my phone is going off every ten minutes with the same unoriginal text message. It got to the point where I just turned my phone off.

I know they all mean well and I suppose I should be “thankful” that I have so many people who care enough about me to send me a text message wishing me a happy holiday. (In fact, many of my friends who read this blog are the ones who sent me text messages. I hope you’re not offended). However, how excited can I get when a person sends me a generic “Happy Holidays” text message that was sent out to every single one of their contacts? Maybe if I got a personalized message that had my name in the text, then I might feel more special.

Also, what is the protocol on replying to the text message? Am I required to reply to every text message I receive on a holiday? Is the person who sent the text message sitting at home, waiting for me to write back and then, subsequently cursing me out for not being courteous enough to send a reply?

My theory on this is to reply to people who write me a personalized text. If you wish me a Merry Christmas through Blackberry Messenger than I know you are only sending it to me and I will gladly respond back. If you send out a message that says “Happy Holidays too all my friends and family,” you will be ignored.

What does everyone else think about this? Am I alone? Do I sound like a jerk writing this? Let me know.

5 comments for “The Holiday Text Message Epidemic is Out of Control

  1. Laura
    December 22, 2009 at 10:31 am

    LOL to this part: This might be the only scenario where a Christian would be jealous of a Jewish holiday.

    I wonder how your fiancee feels about that statement. I agree with you on this column John… not a fan of mass, generic texts. Although I did do that to a few people when I got engaged, because otherwise I would have been on the phone all day. So in some cases I can understand.

  2. Future Mrs. S
    December 22, 2009 at 10:55 am

    Jealous? please. We have 8 nights of presents, Passover, guilt trips and LATKES! I am not jealous of Christmas, Easter, Palm Sunday, Church, Communion, etc. I do enjoy a good tree though :)

  3. December 23, 2009 at 4:35 pm

    I’m not sure which is worse? A text or a “wall post” on facebook.

  4. December 30, 2009 at 1:34 pm

    One note on this. This is a text I received from LwB contributor, Frank Wheeler on Thanksgiving. “I’m thankful for all my friends except you. Go fuck yourself!”

    Now THAT’s how you send a holiday text message!
    .-= John´s last blog ..Links of the Week: December 30, 2009 =-.

  5. Pingback: Muff Slap Recap 1/2/10

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *