I’ve been playing fantasy baseball for many years now. Baseball is my favorite sport and I follow it more closely than any other sport, yet I have yet to win a fantasy baseball title—EVER. It’s beyond frustrating. It seems like no matter how hard I prepare for a draft, or how closely I monitor free agents during the season, something always goes wrong. This season is already shaping up to be another shitty one. When it comes to fantasy baseball, I subscribe to Murphy’s Law—the belief that anything that can go wrong, WILL go wrong.
Here is my “Fantasy Baseball Murphy’s Law” list
The perennial all-star you draft in the first round will have the worst year of his career the year you draft him
The following year, when you pass him over, he will dominate the league
The ace pitcher you draft will announce he is having Tommy John surgery two days after your draft ended
Your best closer will lose the job one month into the season
The guy in your league with five closers will pick up his replacement minutes before you do
You will drop a set-up man the day before he is announced as the new closer
When you finally beat someone to a new closer, he will get hit all over the place and destroy your ERA before being demoted again (see Mark Melancon)
Your relief pitchers will never vulture any wins. But your opponent’s relief pitchers will vulture plenty.
You finally decide to bench a guy after a prolonged slump. The day you bench him, he hits a home run.
You put him back in the lineup the next day and he goes 0-4 with 3 K’s
When torn between starting or benching one of your starting pitchers on the day of his start, whatever decision you make will be the wrong one. If you start him, he will get rocked. If you bench him he’ll throw a no-hitter (this actually happened to me last year, when shitty Francisco Liriano threw a no-hitter).
On a day where you finally get great starting pitching from several guys, one of your relief pitchers will get hit around and ruin your team ERA for the day.
If your starting pitcher leaves the game with a lead, a relief pitcher will always blow the win
If your starting pitcher leaves a tie game with a man on base, the relief pitcher will always allow that run to score and your pitcher will be credited with a loss
If your pitcher is in line for a loss, his team’s offense will never pick him up to tie the game and get him a no-decision
If your league uses quality starts, your pitcher will removed after 5 2/3 innings
If you trade a player because you are deep in a certain position, (i.e. lots of starting pitching), you will be hit with a rash of injuries to that position immediately following the trade.
If you trade away a slumping superstar, he will go on a tear the day the trade was completed
If you trade for a player having a big year, he will get hurt within days of him being on your roster
No matter how many DL slots you have, you will always have one more injured player than allotted DL slots.
Have any other ones? Share it in the comment section. If they’re good, I will add them to the post.
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